Enjoyment when younger
Posted: Tue Mar 03, 2026 12:18 am
Hi all read for past few weeks and hoping I can get advise without prejudice. So I’m 19 and from the age of roughly 13 I started watching things on online mainly lesbians and somthing that kept coming up was women in satin and it didn’t attract me as I thought that’s what my mum wears. So my mum wasn’t posh worked in as a teacher but owned a lot of satin items mainly consisting of nightwear, skirts , coats and blazer linings. To which I never looked at them type of clothes and thought it was sexy. So time goes on roughly over the next few months content online shows so many women wearing satin, I know im not into leather or pvc but to me as I grew up around it satin seemed plain and normal but it started making me think what’s the attraction around it. Couple of weeks again after come home as norm put the jacket away and noticed her I guess you would call every day coat nothing special just a black wool coat but it had a silver satin lining which I touched and didn’t get the Intrest or desire for, later that night I realised when I was watching men and women together the man once brushing satin was getting erect so that night I went down and brushed my downstairs with it and it’s never happened how it went that quick to which again I didn’t understand. I hesitate and leave the area, next night I try get brave to try again and bear in mind my age I wasn’t lasting hours but nearly finished on the coat within 30 seconds I don’t know how I managed to not make a mess but I felt hooked on it. Over the next several months I kept chancing it till a Saturday night my parents are out and notice on the floor in the bathroom a nightie my mum had wore, same idea I frusted it a few times and lasted even less and I started to question the normality of this but I didn’t think I could stop. For the next year I took every moment I could to enjoy any piece but mainly ones she worn so I knew it was going to be cleaned even know I wasn’t going to dirty it (only once I ever made a mess on it by accident) but I don’t know if was the material or the smell of the perfume but was intoxicating, over the next year my interest got bigger and this is where it may go wtf but I started to wear her nicer coats and blazers while doing it I honestly don’t know why but it was amazing. So I get to the age of 16 and think I cannot keep doing this and I choose to stop as it was getting to the point it was wrong. I move out when i was 17 to a house share when I started my apprenticeship and tried to forget it all. Last year my parents decided they want to move so I’m useful for transport and loading the car so most of my stuff I didn’t take with me I loaded in my car but over the year old room became my parents 2nd bedroom/wardrobe and I hate to say I went snooping and found old memories and I hate to say I took with me several nightwear sets that gave me joy and a blazer, they was a coat from jacques vert I loved but I couldn’t fit it. And this box came back with me. To this day this box hasn’t been opened and my questions was is it bad to still want to enjoy it, is it bad if I could grab more I would want to especially the coat, I just don’t feel the buzz or enjoyment maybe because originally they wasn’t mine to enjoy and that made it more fun. Any advise would be much appreciated as the stories I’ve read on here seem to link back to childhood